Today is a hard day for me. It should be a happy day, and it is, I guess, but also sad. My eldest daughter turned 25 today, but I won’t be celebrating with her.
She’s the daughter who cut me out of her life.
I still sent her a gift, cuz, ya know, if I didn’t, then I’d be the Mom who didn’t send a gift to her adult child. I’d be the asshole AGAIN. But I never get a “thanks” or even an acknowledgement that it was received. At least not until I balance my checkbook and see that the check I sent was cashed.
Here she is as a little girl:
And here she is as a beautiful woman:
I guess I will celebrate in my own way. In my own head. Probably with an excess of wine, like I have the last few days.
I can only hope she grows up and out of this hatefulness. If not, well, there’s nothing I can do about it. I’ll just keep trying – putting myself out there, like I always do, risking massive heartache. But if I DON’T try, I’ve definitely lost her.