Ya know, I love my children. I do all I can for them – help them if they can’t pay a Visa bill right away, be the shoulder to cry on (virtually) when shit hits the fan, make them the beneficiaries of my 401(k) and pension, bring them presents from my travels, and, most importantly, love them.
Well, yesterday my eldest, K, decided she didn’t want my help in the form of health insurance anymore. She’d gone to urgent care because her “lungs were on fire.” OK. She couldn’t find her insurance card, so I took photos of the front and back and sent them to her. She was examined, given a prescription for Prednisone, and had a chest x-ray and an EKG. She was thinking she may be allergic to her sister’s cats, but I’m kind of leaning toward she’s smoking too much pot. But I said to let me know what they find out.
I went out to dinner with an attorney from our Denver office when she texted me again. “did you see my text about the EKG” …. well, I don’t keep my phone in front of my nose at all possible moments, so I didn’t see anything right away. OK, she had an EKG. I said yes that I’d seen it but that I was at happy hour (it was that time of day). Then I get a snarky “thanks for caring lol have fun at happy hour.” After that, it was “ok well never mind just take me off your insurance and I’ll figure it out like I’ve had to for everything else in my life. Hope you feel bad.”
WTF. I didn’t do anything to deserve that.
OK, so I didn’t make a ginormous deal about her thing at urgent care, no dramatic questioning, no fawning all over her. Basically, I was “dumped” because I didn’t text her back in a millisecond after hearing she had an EKG. Were there results????? I dunno she never said. Never told me if they came up with any reason that she had “burning lungs.” There’s only so much I can do from 300 miles away, but even so, I did all I could while out to dinner. This “child” is 24 years old. She works part time as a server/bartender. She doesn’t drive. She drinks A LOT and smokes A LOT of pot. She hangs out with a rough crowd and she dates, off and on, a drug dealer. She lives with her Dad and pays just a minimal rent, but leaves her room such a pigsty that it gave her Dad dry heaves while attempting to clean it. She’s your buddy if you help her, especially monetarily, but you are on the ultimate shit list if you say “no” or go against something she wants/asks for etc. She blames me for anything bad that has/is happened/happening in her life. She’s toxic.
I’m seriously so tired of trying to be a mother to someone who doesn’t want me in their life. I guess I have to just cut her loose and let her make her own way. And hope that she changes her tune later on down the line. I’m out of options.